because the name Alvin is taken.

I noticed a lady listening to her iPod while having a cup of coffee on a Wednesday afternoon. Not a typical sight in Malaysia, where the collectivist nature of our culture predominates us, fearing judgment and inhibits us from real behavior and thought.

We exchanged pleasantries, and I noticed that her accent is not typical within the Malaysian population. I asked, and she mentions that she has been working as an accountant in the UK for 3 years but due to the current economic crisis, chose to come back to Malaysia for a break, and maybe even further her studies.

I then noticed a big ring on her index finger, but I ignored it for a moment, since we were having a conversation about which postgraduate programs are offered in the universities here.  It turns out we are living in the same housing area, and she asked about good places to eat there late at night. We exchanged contact details, and I left.

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I was holding an ice blended Espresso, looking for a place to sit. Most of the seats are taken, and there was a person whom from first glance looked like my age. She looked Chinese, but at the same time did not resemble a pure Asian. My first guess would be that she is an Indonesian Chinese, but I could be mistaken. I asked if I could join her, and she nodded.

I noticed the cigarette that she is smoking: long, slim and refined. I asked her about it, and I soon found out that she is from Kazakhstan, and that the cigarettes were from her home country. I found out that Kazakhstan is a country between Russia and China, hence the mixed look (pardon my lack of Geography knowledge). She’s studying at a University College nearby, and lives at a high rise student condominium visible from the cafe. She said ‘it was nice to meet you’ and proceeded to get on a cab. There was a brief moment of hesitation on her part as she was leaving.

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We often tell jokes or stories that give the best response:  laughter, amazement, or to any effect that we feel we would want to project to the other party. We find ourselves telling the same jokes to different people because it fulfills the purpose of a joke, which is to inject humor into the conversation. The more we use these conversational threads, the more proficient we  get at it. We adopt these as conversational routines.

We just simply get better at talking by talking to more people and finding out what works. Chemistry does not happen by itself, it is made.

Discovering that conversation does not flow by mere coincidence made me see things in a different light. At first, a pessimistic view by which everything seemed mechanical. Later on, joy to be able to discover an individual’s unique self through rich and fulfilling communication.

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I meant to publish this sooner, but didn’t come around on doing it. I will be doodling again, for safekeeping. kuansean is open for business