Filed under: And Socrates laughed in his grave, hormonal imbalance, the opposite sex
How long does it take for a person to take an event in his/her life to have happened a long time ago? My first good friend, first crush, first girlfriend, first kiss, first heartbreak- Did it happen a long time ago or did that happen in a tiny fragment of my life? It feels like I’m slowly cutting away slices of this cake called Life, never realizing that one day it’ll just run out. Did I really take the time to enjoy it or did I simply gobble everything up and wallow in self pity later on, realizing that it has finished?
For the past 20 years of my life (this is almost 1/3 of the cake, considering how unhealthy and stressful living in Malaysia is) , I’ve never realized that I have lived for such a long time. Weeks feel like days. I go through each week of the semester, ushering a new one without feeling the pinch of losing 168 hours of my life. It feels like it was only yesterday that I’ve last met old friends when in reality, its been months, even years. It has been more than 2 1/2 years since secondary school ended. More than 2 years since I first step foot into college. Is time moving too fast, or have I been taking time for granted?
We have to learn to look forward. I have to learn to look forward. But if all we do is look forward, do we neglect the past and present? We all look forward to a new beginning. When that beginning comes, there will always be another new beginning. Will I see it coming when that new beginning is already the end?
We always think that the grass is greener on the other side. We feel a sense of security, thinking that things will always be better if we move on. All we do is hope that our decisions are the right ones, and it will bring us to something better- something new. Is new always what we want? I have polished my guitar, trying to repeat the cycle of finding something new. It does seem a bit odd that this cycle of finding this thing called new seems old.
Maybe the old had always been better, its just that we were too busy looking forward to realize what we already have.
